Funny Family Situations Gifts

'My little sister can't come to school today - She's teaching my Dad how to operate his computer!'

Kid to pastor: 'Which office is heaven?'

"Have you met my bodyguard?"

"Two boys from legal to see you."

Billy strip: comic will make you sick.

'...you'd better get yourself a good lawyer!'

Help!I am being forced to eat vegetables

"Being a parent is like being in prison. . . except we don't get the hour of exercise."

'Are you sure you didn't swallow your cell phone? I keep getting a dial tone.'

'My wife and I can't have dogs!'

"I'd like my son seated in the first row."

"Mom said I can't watch TV until you finish my homework."

"Next time your virtual fish dies, please don't try flushing your computer down the toilet."

Bubbies and technology

"Pianissimo! Pianissimo!"

'If you haven't been taking your vitamins. What have you been doing with them?'

"The wife thinks he's at summer camp."

"How did my mom know I went to get ice cream after school? She's either placed a tracking device on me, or she's tracking my phone."

Even before we began to order in, my dad was always keen to skip the dishes!

'Let's hit the road, son! We are Baby Bjorn to be wild!'

'Before I mow the grass, I'd like to quote from section four, paragraph c, of the state child labor code...'

"Look. He's just created his first text output object."

"My dad and I are trading important life skills. He's teaching me how to change the oil in the car."

Thanks to Floss-A-Cuffs, parents can be certain that their kids will maintain proper oral hygiene.

'Sorry! I thought nobody would notice.'

'I'll bet my Dad's pants are bigger than yours.'

'I'm gonna die.'

'If you're planning to move back in here with your mother and me, you'll have to abide by our rules.'

"Papi! Baldo broke my favorite pencil!"

Call Center Agents Should Be Able To Apologize And To Admit Mistakes.

'These are the last of the pull-ups, so no on have a taxi-dent, OK?'

'Your trainers really whiff.' - 'Yeah, they're awful, aren't they?!' - 'Do something about !!!' - 'Oh, I see...'

Tired mum vacuums baby

'Do you know how hard Daddy had to work to get all those dinosaur brains?'

'Just so i'll know you can't resuscitate a grape-nut, right?'