Funny Family Situations Gifts

'My little sister can't come to school today - She's teaching my Dad how to operate his computer!'

Kid to pastor: 'Which office is heaven?'

"Have you met my bodyguard?"

"Two boys from legal to see you."

Billy strip: comic will make you sick.

Help!I am being forced to eat vegetables

'...you'd better get yourself a good lawyer!'

"Being a parent is like being in prison. . . except we don't get the hour of exercise."

'Are you sure you didn't swallow your cell phone? I keep getting a dial tone.'

"I'd like my son seated in the first row."

'My wife and I can't have dogs!'

"Mom said I can't watch TV until you finish my homework."

"Next time your virtual fish dies, please don't try flushing your computer down the toilet."

"Pianissimo! Pianissimo!"

'If you haven't been taking your vitamins. What have you been doing with them?'

'Let's hit the road, son! We are Baby Bjorn to be wild!'

"The wife thinks he's at summer camp."

Even before we began to order in, my dad was always keen to skip the dishes!

"How did my mom know I went to get ice cream after school? She's either placed a tracking device on me, or she's tracking my phone."

'Before I mow the grass, I'd like to quote from section four, paragraph c, of the state child labor code...'

"Look. He's just created his first text output object."

'Sorry! I thought nobody would notice.'

Tired mum vacuums baby

'Do you know how hard Daddy had to work to get all those dinosaur brains?'

Call Center Agents Should Be Able To Apologize And To Admit Mistakes.

'Your trainers really whiff.' - 'Yeah, they're awful, aren't they?!' - 'Do something about !!!' - 'Oh, I see...'

'I'm gonna die.'

"Papi! Baldo broke my favorite pencil!"

'If you're planning to move back in here with your mother and me, you'll have to abide by our rules.'

'These are the last of the pull-ups, so no on have a taxi-dent, OK?'

'Just so i'll know you can't resuscitate a grape-nut, right?'

'You aren't very good with children, are you Dad?'