Family Funny Moments Gifts

'These are the last of the pull-ups, so no on have a taxi-dent, OK?'

Kid to pastor: 'Which office is heaven?'

"Have you met my bodyguard?"

'You're one of my kids? Really? I'm so sorry, I have so many it's hard to remember them all...'

'I'm about to have a tantrum. What are you doing?'

"Your mother and I want to make your 21st birthday a moving experience. We'll help you pack."

Billy strip: comic will make you sick.

"Two boys from legal to see you."

"Mom! Dad! Do something!"

Great job on the color! Thanks. It looks totally natural. Hi, Twig! Hey. Success! She didn't notice. "Mom dyed her hair with Gatorade."

"Being a parent is like being in prison. . . except we don't get the hour of exercise."

"So tell me, Wallace. Has someone gobbled up my Viagra again?" "No. Wait. I thought they were delicious candy mints!"

"But you said I should serve our guests the can of peas!"

'Who says women don't like chase scenes?'

'...you'd better get yourself a good lawyer!'

'Are you sure you didn't swallow your cell phone? I keep getting a dial tone.'

'Shh, let me do the talking.'

'You're making a marble cake? Did you run out of eggs?'

"I'd like my son seated in the first row."

"Which one of my fiendish offspring defaced the bordelaise recipe with SpongeBob?"

Adult Absence Notes.

Dad... this 'Book' thingy - where do you plug it in?

"One day you'll thank me for embarrassing you in front of the entire Internet."

"Mom said I can't watch TV until you finish my homework."

"Next time your virtual fish dies, please don't try flushing your computer down the toilet."

Chip and Fran Cooper: The Most Embarrassing Parents in the World.

"Pianissimo! Pianissimo!"

Meerkats - A Family Portrait

'Sweetheart, It's time you knew... Your father isn't a real wildlife biologist.'

'Daddy-if we didn't have Mummy how would you know how to drive?'

"I didn't say he was housebroken. I said he broke up the house."

Danny reminds his dad that he had forgotten to pay him for raking the yard.

Dad said that if he's paying for the wedding, he's entitled to a little something.

"Well, if you've got 'nothing to wear' why am I constantly doing laundry?"

'I don't like the look of yours...'