Funny Bone Tickler Pillows

'Just shoot! You're thinking about it too much!!'

'Must have been an old can of alphabet soup. No spell checker.'

'Your reflexes are still good!'

'Do you want to play doctor?' 'I can't, you're not insured.'

'What's wrong with me, Doctor?' 'I have no idea! That information comes within doctor-patient confidentiality.'

'There's always one.'

'Don't stare at his icing.'

Welcome to Palm Springs.

'You'll never forget your college experience, though grades indicate you've tried.'

'You realize, of course, there's a seven-day waiting period.'

'Do you realise how many years I've had to work to develop this lifestyle? And now you're telling me to change it!'

'Swimming: Mon-Thurs - Ice Skating: Fri- Sun.'

Shoe saleman responds to clown's stinky foot

'That's 59p for the flight will you be needing the £345 'access to the toilet' option?'

'Crumbs! I'm holding out for the whole loaf.'

'Yes Mr Hare, you were right: He IS on steroids!'

"You've got night fever."

"You could be just the man we're looking for!"

'I wish I came in a child-proof container.'

'When she said she was taking taking up a Japanese art I thought she meant origami...'

Can I go to the Computer Tennis Camp?

Autumn arrived in the middle of Dan's backswing

"Our teeth-cleaning procedure is 100% organic."

"Aw, c’mon, dad. You know how I hate to see that look of separation anxiety on your face."

"Well, I'm not going to starve-now who's the crazy cat lady?"

Planes copying air marshals.

"I won't have kids until gay men are able to give birth in every state."

"How much further away from it all will we be going?"

"Today is the day I start the new me!"

Helping Hand

"Leave the box."

"I have an imaginary friend. He's a real person – he just isn't really my friend."

"Call me!"

"This may be the catnip talking, but you are the most beautiful thing I have ever seen."

"I have way too much stuff so go ahead and take it all."