Fungus Enthusiast Gifts

'You are right; it does appear to be some kind of a fungus.'

'Normally I'd remove it but I's like to just watch this one.'

"Those socks are damp."

"Fred, I think you're spending altogether too much time down here with these mushrooms!"

MUSHROOM MASACRE.

"I read somewhere that truffles are a gateway fungus."

The Garden

"I think this is the perfect place to grow a family."

'Since Fleming already beat you to it with penicillin, I take it we can dispose of your week-old sandwich?'

A drooping plant is watered via an IV tube.

'Do I really have to remind you again about which one of us earns the truffles, Jean-Claude?'

'Ah, now's there's something different....'

"That's no death grimace, Perkins. I think what we're seeing is a 2.8 million-year-old tight smile of spousal event obligation!"

"You can tell when people don't have pets, because they start to look like their plants."

'Turn right at the Robinia pseudoacacia, pass the garden with the salvia officinalis, cross the road when you see the stranvaesia davidinia and the pub is on the left!'

'Well number 34 has run dry and is now pumping fossils.'

"You've got a real fungus problem. You'll have to move out until it's taken care of."

'Walking your pet amoeba again, Henry?'

'This species of fungi was last spotted in Oxford by Alice Liddell in 1862!'

'Are these mushrooms edible?'

Adios Amoebas

"I just realized what our problem is - we're fungible."

"I'd say it's a fungal infection."

"Aren't you worried you might poison your customers?"

'Jack contracted botrytis cinerea. It hasn't done much for his looks, but his disposition's a lot sweeter.'

Black Truffles!

"You, my tenacious weed, are trespassing!"

The mushroom pickers

'This underground facility allows us to be closely involved with proton decay, gravity waves, neutrinos and the growing and selling of mushrooms.'

"Yes, sir, it's Houstonia Michauxii and it prefers shade or semi-shade."

'Honey, do we have a problem with mold in our house?'

'Mom, Dad - this is Jeremy.'

"I used to be a tulip in a previous life" - Reincarnation

Magic Mushrooms

'Of course I'll need to run some tests; but offhand I'd say it's some sort of fungus infection.'