Funeral Curio Collector Mugs

Coffin in funeral home reads: Display Copy Only.

"You're on a what?!"

'My luck, I buy a bottle of wine from 450 B.C. and it's still five years from reaching maturity.'

Barristers

Cat statues on entrance gate

"I got a swiss army hook!"

'Being stuck on a desert island is one thing, but being struck on a desert island with a hoarder...'

Posh Easter Egg

'I don't think I've ever heard of the Geezer Scouts or Geezer Scout cookies.'

"My goodness, no! Grandfather would never, ever let us near this!!"

'It's a statue of St. Francis of Assisi. I had it specially made for my hospital.'

News of the Day - Savings Bank.

John Ixon: Ran Out of Survival Tips.

In the House of Picasso, the Cat: "You beast, you've eaten all the first class stamps again," Madame accuses Timothy.

A mummy begs for change in front of the pyramids.

The Unknown Attorney: The First To Double His Billable Rate.

'It even tells time in metric minutes.'

"Did you hear? It turns out old power cords are really valuable! Good things Dad kept them!"

Man tried to unload a ship in a bottle.

An old gentleman speaking with a shoeblack at a train station

Museum of dog memorabilia

"I'll take it."

I brake for anything discarded that I can bring to the antiques roadshow.

"Hi honey, do we need anything for the junk drawer?"

Victorian Secret

'Jack and the Beanie stock'

Mr Punch's Design for A Statue to Miss Nightingale

"Everyone is so cynical these days."

'Village store and Food museum'

"I like this one. Do you think it will look good when knocked from the table to the floor?"

'Ever try beating a ploughshare into a sword?'

Seven dwarves marching through a living room.

Frankenstein Collectibles: Buyer Beware