Fundraising Guru Pillows

'Basically, what you're saying is I get a box of chocolate chip cookies and the sixth grade class gets a field trip to Tuscany?'

"The shock of an unsolicited grant was just too much."

"Our war is against cancer."

'Due to the poor response to the roof repair fund we cannot afford to lift the rafters when rejoicing in song.'

"We need volunteers for the car chasing fundraiser."

"You can either make a pledge or join us in this weekend's Barkathon."

"I'm in nonprofit work for the money."

Pearly King and Queen

'I don't think I've ever heard of the Geezer Scouts or Geezer Scout cookies.'

"Giving is down at the church, so we are charging an entrance fee."

"Well, we got the grant."

"I'll match donations when you match my tax payments."

'And now, concerning the special collection...'

"Congratulations. Please remember the college's financial plight. Congratulations. Please remember the college's financial plight. Congratulations. Please remember . . ."

Bake Sale! To benefit our town animal shelter

The nonprofit dog fight.

"Look! It's the Montgomerys from the breast-cancer walk."

"I'm sorry, but you'll have to get approval from the offices of Terminology, Evidence, Proof of Demand, Documentation, Measurement and Predictions before I can even think about signing off."

Girl Scout cookies selling the girl scout.

"Waldo starts a GoFindMe."

'I'm getting a head start for Movember.'

"The nonprofit competitive grant season begins

Vicar prays for money for church repairs.

Large cap funds

"I told him he was allowed one phone call. He's making a pledge to Channel 13."

'Let me introduce my biggest supporter, a real whale of a guy, a huge fan..'

Appeals

Marathon costume

Campaign Trail

"I do a lot for charity but I don't like to talk about it. . ."

"We need volunteers for the car chasing fund raiser."

'Do we have enough money for sweets yet?'