Fund Finder Pillows

'I have found $80,000 under the cushions.'

Fishing sign.

'This is the BEST well we've dug!!'

"There's more inside."

'Throw me back and I'll tell you where a 12-pounder is hiding.'

'The best grants lie that-a-ways, Ma'am.'

Fishing direction sign.

'Your future looks charming.'

"Let me know if you smell any large-mouth bass."

"Please, Lord, enough already."

"Secondhand books, reheated coffee"

'Can you get me in touch with people that own me money?'

'I want you stop referring to our grant as 'The Big Dipper.''

'The very name 'windfall profits' show it's an act of god.'

"Either the fortune cookie cutter failed, or you have a lot of issues you're not telling your mother about."

'They want to close our lab. What's that all about?'

The Institute Of Innovative Ways To Get Government Grants.

"Oh great!...He;s a fitness guru!!"

'You can lead a horse to water, Ezra, but you can't...?'

"I'm applying for a grant to be able to apply for more grants."

'Oh, just send it the cheapest way.'

business illustration

When Tia Carmen says... "Every misfortune you have carries in it the seed of tomorrow's good luck!" it means... "I didn't win the lottery last week, but this week that jackpot's mine!"

'Continuing to deficit spend during a budget crunch is what makes America great!'

Mr. Fun

The back-to-school shopping season claims its first victim.

Whatever you're thinking of buying, we promise to make you feel slightly inferior.

'What's gold doing now'

'Bad news. . . Things are too good to get any grant money.'

"I finally acquired enough wealth to buy nearly anything I want but I can't remember what it was I wanted."

'You wanted this vase? Don't worry, I'll be having a yard sale tomorrow and you can buy it.'

'I'm coming out of the closet. I'm into material wealth, and I'm not afraid to admit it.'

'They have a defibrillator in there.'