Fun-loving Sommelier T-Shirts

"Is there any way I can un-drink this wine?"

'Have you tried our home-made wine?'

'... And this is my cellar.'

"I remember his last words were, 'Another bite and I'll burst!'..."

Keith Floyd.

'Would you care to see our wine list, water list, soda list, tea list, coffee list, single malt scotch list, or beer list?'

'I'm into natural foods, Joe -- give me a martini with a soybean in it.'

"I'm getting plasma, iron and platelets. RH positive!"

'Been toying with Bordeaux futures again, have we?'

"I'm sure you've heard of foodies - he's a drinkie."

'In the interests of full disclosure, federal law now requires me to inform you that I own shares in the winery whose product I am serving this evening.'

Nouveau wine

"I'm feeling less stressed since I set my biological clock back an hour."

'This Chardonnay is so over-oaked, it comes with a 2-year service contract from Terminix.'

"I'm in the middle of a local wine tasting tour."

"You may not know this, but I've become quite the wine expert."

"And this is our 'panic room'. We usually pop in here after watching the nightly news."

'And this is my dad. He's the wine critic for The Herald and he can drink your dads under the table.'

Things I didn't know about before 2020.

The perfect martini.

'I wonder if we strike wine again!'

'How many times did you think you could get away with using the term 'bouchon d'expedition' on the first date?'

Introducing Brocco. The world's first broccoli-flavored liqueur!

'This wine doesn't need to breathe...it needs CPR!'

"Which one had the health benefits in it?"

"While here, you'll have to try our food desert, too!"

"Red with meant, white with fish. . . but it all goes great with chocolate!"

"Might I suggest a full-bodied white?"

"Oh no, it's far too tart"

'Sir has made the most discerning choice to wash it down with Drain Glug.'

(I'm tasting berries with deep earth overtones and a definite hint of almond) (That would be the Cyanide.)

Advanced course at the Wine Appreciation Institute in my house.

"I thought it came with an acorn."

Grape vines think alike.

'Your House Wines seem rather pricey - d'you have any Bungalow Wines?'