Fun-loving Dog Owner Pillows

Elevator: Up, Stay, and Lay Down.

"And always remember...If you're going to be sick, always do it on the carpet. It's more absorbent."

Dog Hunting Trophies.

'Table scraps, doggie-bag goodies, dropped hot dogs, the cat's dish of food and your master's slippers.'

'Super Dog'

'Sometimes, I wonder if Master realizes we are dogs: He always says 'good boy, good boy'...'

'The attendant is very good. I tip him the occasional sparrow.'

Spot Quiz....

'Sit, Rollover, Heel'

To them it's just a Prada handbag

"He followed me home, can I keep him?"

'I want a dog who will fetch my things, so don't sell me one that drools.'

K9 Literati.

"C'mon already...that lipstick really isn't my shade."

Pet Pony

'I thought this was a documentary about animal cruelty.'

"You say you're flossing, but I'm scraping off a lot of tennis ball fuzz."

"It's just until he gets over his laryngitis."

'This won't take long, nurse. This is the dog that got my best friend last summer.'

"Bad dog!"

'Good book?'

'Who's best friend are you?'

Two cats are high off catnip.

"I'm getting a little itchy to redo the bedroom!"

-'Do you have a last wish senor?' -'Yeah, I'd like to pee on your leg.'

Dog at a restaurant

A girl with a dog and balloons

Dalmation with soccer ball: Soccer Hound.

"Dangerous? Nah, I could count on one hand the number of times he's bitten me."

'On a scale of 1 to 10, 10 being the highest, how attached are you to the cat?'

'None of them is dead! They're just doing this to embarrass me!'

"The 'yip yip yip' is mine. Stick to your 'woof woof woof.'"

'Can't you just hand me a plastic worm?!'