Fun Family Gatherings Pillows

"I have to twinkle"

'Well, it's your fault for wearing my slippers.'

"Are you insane?!" The Velveteen Skunk

"Did I hear the dog in here?"

If you bathe a skunk in tomato juice, it will smell like a dog. A bird in the hand is better than two in your shorts. Never wear aqua after Thanksgiving. Unconventional wisdom.

"They must be grown-up ducks, because they're eating the crusts too."

"There was no other choice, Mom. It was a double dog dare."

'Ahhh...'

Uncle demonstrating chemical experiments to children

"Oh, no - Karen baked a cake so dense that not even light can escape."

T"ruly, Susan, I envy no man."

"I know, I know, every time we come here, I swear I'm going to try something new, but I always end up getting the same thing."

"Thanks to my wedding planner, everyone in the wedding is still talking to each other."

Christmas Tree

"Hi-yah!"

#Thanksgiving #Nofilter

"I'm afraid the challah got a little burnt this week."

Child laughs while making farting sound under arm. Dad says, 'Isn't it nice when they find something they're good at?

Wedding Day Itinerary.

"I'm not eating cookies before dinner. I'm having cookies for dinner!"

"Can I have another sausage Dad?"

Duke of Clarence (Later William IV) Promenading with Family

"What makes you think I'm dripping it on my shirt?"

Barbecued dessert, anyone? The coals are PERFECT now!

"I say it's Kale, and I say it's spinaches shitfaced uncle."

'Thank goodness you were wrong mom, dad says a period is what comes at the end of a sentence.'

"Mommy's going to teach you how to make a hamburger."

"Whose turn is it to lick the knife?"

"I ask that today is a good day...a day that brings family together...to show how we need one another."

Polygamists' Picnic

'No. The television screen hasn't gone red - You've got tomato ketchup all over your glasses!'

"See this jelly wobbling. It was waving goodbye."

"Mom, does the Russian borscht you made for dinner give me foreign-policy experience?"

"This is where baby gets some alone time."

"Be sure to check out the rides. They're free, too, with the purchase of tickets."