Fuel Economy Expert Gifts

Cars feeding at a gas tanker on the side of the road

Can't afford to get there - please pass

'Are we broke yet?'

Power corrupts & oil-shortage power corrupts absolutely

"I used to love power, but now I'm more interested in mileage."

"Gas. Regular. Premium. Super. You don’t want to know."

Doug fights back at soaring gas prices.

"We're off. We got a loan to fill er up!"

GAS. If you have to ask, you probably can't afford it.

' Can I borrow change for the bus? With the cost of gas, I just can't justify buzzing around the city in that thing.'

'One thing about being in the drivers seat -- you pay for the gas.'

Oil shock.

"It was $78 but that was when you started filling, it's $96 Now."

"We're not certain why they disappeared, but archeologists speculate that it may have had something to do with their size."

The Heating Oil Problem.

"...and you've got private use of it, so long as you don't exceed 10,000 mile per annum.'

Propane Supply

Short Memories

You need a bigger car/You need a smaller car.

The New Modern-Day Lament.

"You wouldn't believe how much it costs to feed eight tiny reindeer."

Peak Oil - 'Are we there yet, Dad?'

The last drop of oil...

'Turn right at the first $4.09 unleaded, then a hang a left at $4.03 unleaded, and over the bridge, past the $4.01 unleaded...'

"Make it a gallon and a half. I'm living one day at a time."

'America uses 20 million barrels of oil a day. Our profits are up, but is it sustainable? Will consumers run out of money?'

"When are you gonna tell him he's in the protest convoy and not a queue for petrol?"

'But on the plus side, I felt better about owning an SUV as soon as I bought some oil stocks.'

"Clean your wallet, sir?"

With gas prices soaring, many stations have begun posting EMS teams next to their pumps.

Pot of Gold...

Sports futility vehicles

"U.S. Imports of foreign fuel are down, Putin's angry rhetoric is up, U.S. gas prices are up, Russian fuel exports are down. . ."

Zero Fuel Taxis

"Would you like to memorialize this expensive tank of gas with a receipt?"