Fruity Financier Gifts

Apples...37 Spinach...43 Peaches...51

"We were able to retire 6 years early by canceling cable & eliminating anything fun."

"Ten Dollars?! I can't eat that." Bob was on a strict low-cost diet.

Thrift: New way to eat eggs (avoid needless transport costs).

'That's what I thought, finances are tight: She's switched to no-name cat food...'

'If by 'great', you mean 'terrible', then yes, we have plenty of great beers for under $4.00 a six-pack.'

Thrift: have your arms and legs amputated, use a pillow for a bed!

"I had that nightmare again where everyone found out I'm in my late thirties and still have no idea how the stock market works."

"In the current market, it's just more practical."

'Perfect. Do you deliver?'

'It's cheaper than gas.'

Piggy bank #5: carrying (colour).

'Twenty percent bluechips, ten percent small-caps, five percent currency hedges and the remainder in cash. Get that list to Santa right away.'

Dollar Sign Christmas Tree.

'How much did you save this year?'

Melissa's Mark Prediction Service

Welcome all to the monthly gathering of Tightwads United. Hi there. Hello. Hey. On tonight's agenda: Dumpster diving, coupon clipping, and a special lecture. How to carpool while always getting the other person to drive. I'm like a god. Woohoo!! Yeah!!! Clap clap clap clap clap clap clap. Tightwads United.

Doris was determined to save money on cat parlour fees!

"...there, I found it. Stellar! I love this nutrition app!"

'Listen, Santa. Either you repay what you owe, or we reposses Rudolph!'

'Less spare change under the cushion is my leading economic indicator!'

'It took a six hour operation to remove this fiver from your fist.'

"Is that neat whisky?"

Martin hated dining alone – but loved the savings.

"I always say; 'You don't need to spend a lot of money to have a good time on a first date."

"Santa, snow is falling." "Sell snow!"

"Okay then, what wine do you have if we go up to the four-dollar range?"

Santa using the stock exchange to keep track of stocks and bonds being good or bad as well as going up or down

Right now my brother Al is paying a psychiatrist a hundred bucks an hour to hear his troubles, while I'm drinking beer and telling you mine at happy hour prices. Obviously, Al IS the crazy one.

"Fuel poverty is not the same as being too mean to switch the heating on...."

"... And how are you enjoying the cheapest bottle of wine on the menu?"

Fruit Bonnet

'And don't say you could have done it cheaper and better at home.'

'We had a white Christmas but we'll be in the red until April.'

"Do you have something cheap but with a really expensive label?"