Fruit Cake Fan Pillows

'What are the best things to put into fruit cake?'

Apples for sale

Unforgettable, that's what you are... Gnat King Cole

'I'm going to make a batch of my ginger biscuits.'

Cake Free Zone

Apple Pie Abduction

Gooseberry Fool...

"Isn't it an amazing co-incidence that this is an orange, and it IS ORANGE?"

"His mother had a great influence on him. She always made him eat his fruits and vegetables."

Ball as water-melon.

"No, Mother, I don't think Julian Assange is going to leak your recipe for fruitcake."

"I just need help getting the pit out."

Smiling Cake: Brave yet stupid pastry...smiled all the way to the small intestine

Psychiatrist says: 'Oh, no! Not another fruit cake?'

"Believe me it's only an apple."

""Stop fidgeting. This is supposed to be a still-life."

Repulse Monkey. Difficult position, but one day it may save your life. Get it right!

The Brazilian Blow dry

Flan-eating bacteria

Making healthy eating bearable.

"I'm sorry, we advertised for an 'Au Pair'."

Strawberry Shake

"Okay, it if makes you feel better...yes, I have stock in a banana company."

"I just found a lacto-vegan restaurant and Janet from accounts says she's FRUITAIAN!"

I love what you've done with your hare.

Cake Walk.

"I don't really think you're cut out for this job..."

"At the Christmas Artifacts Museum"

"Yes, it is hot in here."

Banana

"Tell me, what is it you plan to do with your one wild and precious day when you're ripe and not yet mealy?"

"You can eat all the cake you want and still get into heaven."

'Chocolate covered raisins, chocolate covered strawberries...is not what I mean when I said that fruit is healthy for you.'

"Do you have these apples in green?"

Doctor to patient: 'Tell me about these melon-collie feelings.'