Frugal Shopper T-Shirts

"I've discovered a great way to diet...I just look at the price of food and I lose my appetite!"

"It's about time the price of generic drugs went down! Oh, and give me fifty quick picks."

"Next week we pay the five pence for a bag, ok...?"

'If you keep walking, you'll save a hundred percent.'

'You really should pay attention to current events that affect your food budget.'

"Business was good this week! Let's go on a shopping spree!"

"They're on special offer so I got three times more than I could ever use for twice as much as I could afford!"

'If by 'great', you mean 'terrible', then yes, we have plenty of great beers for under $4.00 a six-pack.'

'I've never opened her up on the highway, but I get great mileage in the city!'

"There's more inside."

Cheapskate Cruises

'What can you get with a quarter?'

"Secondhand books, reheated coffee"

The Bargain Brand

"No one can afford to eat us anymore."

How much would you take off for cash?

"Why pay for a tree in November when you can get one off the side of the road in January for free?"

"They've worked out the can save money by sharing toilet reading material."

"He's given up trying to find anything else he can cut to reach 40% savings."

"There's no getting away from the numbers....only by forgetting holidays, giving up drink, the cinema, meals out and socialising...will we be able to afford any quality of life when we retire."

"Why can't you just buy some modern LED lights?"

"You've got two more things to worry about now. You're mad and I'm expensive."

'Two can't live as cheaply as one, but we will get double - occupancy rates when we travel'

"If I promise to come back serval times, can I get the group rate?"

Affordable housing

'We've all had to cut costs a smidge.'

"I don't need one, Gracie. My shopping list is very simple! Things I have a coupon for and things that are on sale!"

Low income vampires.

Yard Sale: Like-New Kitchen Gadgets

"Tia Carmen! We're at Plaza Mall...not Flaco's Flea Market!"

Garage sale.

Buying roses - 'You got any with no stem?'

'Oh, just send it the cheapest way.'

A Room (with adequate light and ventilation, no psychotic neighbors, near a grocery store, in a halfway-decent building in an O.K. neighborhood [not Queens, please God] for under $2000 a month) of One's Own

"If this doesn't work I'll turn on the heat."