Frugal Fun-seeker Pillows

'Well, this is goodbye, Joe -- my wife is making me get direct deposit.'

'Yes, he does tend to overcharge a bit.'

Man to realtor: 'How much for a starter cubicle?'

"Microwave to replace gas or oil central heating?" "Yes. Think how cheap it is to microwave a cup of tea!"

"Basically, your new job here at the Treasury Department implementing the bailout is simple, Grayson, just grab and armful of money and run..."

Craft Donuts vs. Craft Beer

'All those in favor of requesting a government bailout, say 'Karl Marx'.'

"I don't know...seems like budget cuts have gone pretty far this year."

''No other gods before me'? Oh - You're one of THOSE types.'

'Even More Disciples'

Fortune cookies based on various business magazines.

"However, we're doing rather well, according to uninformed sources."

'What do you call money that slides off the collection plate?'

"I like my steak well done."

Jesus breaks the bread.

'There it is! I've isolated the origin of the firm's demise.'

'Stocks gyrated today on news life is full of suprises.'

"If you can't take it with you, this must be Hell."

'Does he do anything besides watch the money?'

Sale - All Junk Bonds 50% Off.

'If you mean Janet, she works the late shift.'

Sounds of the market hitting all time highs. . .

"Why pay for a tree in November when you can get one off the side of the road in January for free?"

'Sometimes it's not a very good idea to be indecisive.'

"Don't put your money into stocks. Bury it!"

Shareholders Meeting - I don't like the look of this year's annual shindig.

'I could only afford a Yo.'

"You know we could have eaten the same food at home for less than a fourth of the cost...so I guess the sixty-two fifty was so you didn't have to wash the dishes!"

'Fathers Day.'

Cross Umbrella

'I'm sorry, sir, but cheeseburgers are out of season.'

"Why can't you just buy some modern LED lights?"

'One really nice thing up here is that it's always very easy to get an audience with a Pope.'

"Page 1 is 'Best-Sellers.' Page 2 is 'Advice, How-To, and Miscellaneous,' and on the back is 'And Bear in Mind.' "

"He's given up trying to find anything else he can cut to reach 40% savings."