Frizz Fighter Pillows

The Anti-flat shampoo worked.

"As soon as the leaves turn, my hair goes crazy."

Frizzy hair

"This anti-frizz serum, do you do it in a smaller size?"

Pounding speeds up the computer.

Rage.

"Our new associate asks how much of a fee is too much. Do you want to handle this or shall I laugh in his face?"

"This statement from your headmaster says that you can easily get a good degree...your bank manager says you can't."

'It's the only known prevention for swine flu...Big bad wolf serum...'

"The problem with these instructions is that they assume I have the attention span to actually read something."

Vaccine

'The scariest story I know is escalating health care costs.'

'I'll just put them here until the danger of frost passes - probably next April'

Tangled Earphones Support Group.

"We do not usually acknowledge unsolicited manuscripts, but we want you to know that we tore yours into tiny pieces. Yours sincerely, The Op-Ed Page."

"Is this something that could hold till Monday, Chris?"

A street fight.

'I can't believe this.. biggest fight of my life, and I forget to pack a wallop.'

Flu Vaccine.

"This feels so familiar."

'You've got swine flu and I think it's begun to mutate.'

'It appears Alzedo is toying with his opponent.'

Pick one: ounce of prevention or pound of cure.

"Yes, it's snowing in my office. Corporate feels utilities, like heat, are a luxury."

'No, you haven't missed much. Pretty well everyone called in sick.'

'Can't come in to work today. I'm in bed with a nasty bug.'

Wrestling Champion.

"He may be Sven the Slayer to you, but to me he's still Mr Cuddly Bun!"

Trick or Treatment.

"Have you seen my hot water bottle?"

"After giving them the runaround for five minutes, pass them on to anger management."

Feelings towards radios #2 Picket signs with pictures of radios on them

'You know that thin person inside you, struggling to get out? -- He seems to have gained weight, too.'

"As your attorney, Roger, I feel it's my duty to charge you an enormous amount of money."

"Here comes someone now. If we're lucky they haven't had their fly shot, or won't wash their hands!"