Friendship Fumbler Gifts

'No, but my friends hate me intensely.'

'It says I missed freshmen Orientation and I have to take it in summer school in order to graduate.'

"I'm not growling, it's my stomach rumbling!"

"My mom says I can start a rock band if I call it 'I Love My Mommy'. You in?"

"I'm not napping yet, but I am getting ready to with a pre-nap warm up."

'Max and I have a give and take relationship. He sniffs my butt...and I let him.'

The Final Chapter.

Living with a cataholic.

'Here goes the second bottle of champagne... I think it would be fair of You to tell me what are my chances so I know whether to order another bottle or not...'

"So, next week, if it's okay with our wives, wanna have another playdate?"

"Don't you just love that new cat smell?"

'Serves you right, just tearing open the charge card bill and reading it like that!!'

'I can dish it out, but I can't take it.'

Sun. Rain.

"In case you hadn't noticed, this is a multiple cat home!"

"It would appear that our 'rainy day investment fund' hasn't even yielded enough to buy us an umbrella each."

'Have you been eating right?'

'Kevin was plagued since childhood by fears of a monster under his bed, but eventually overcame it until he and his monster became inseparable best friends.'

'Now THERE'S a friendship I've never quite understood. That's Ludwig van Beethoven on the left, with Harvey Fernquist, the inventor of telephone 'hold' music!'

"It's a great property: the highlights are three cat-flaps, two litter trays, two scratch poles and of course, no bath..."

"First me stock split, then my wife ran away with my broker, then my driverless car drove off without me..."

'In my book, any interrogation involving water constitutes torture.'

"The meaning of "crazy"? Well, it means "kind and caring" of course, like in the expression "crazy cat lady"..."

"God, if you can help me find a seat by my friends, I'll listen to my teachers, do my homework and clean my room..."

Birdhouse Shapes

Cat about to get an injection from a vet.

Baseball says to prankster basketball: You're such a joker.

Just in: Condolence cards for the small investor.

'Our mortgage is now owned by a guy named Lenny the Squid in bayonne, N.J.'

"Sure, I may shed too much...I'm not always a 'cool cat'...dirt gets tuck in my whiskers... and I don't kill my prey right away...but if someone can see past all that to my warm, loving core...they're probably close enough to scratch."

"He's down to his last three or four lives."

Bad kitty! You have to wait for me to open it first!

"He and I are definitely friends. I'm just not sure we're best friends."

"Someone is approaching the house, Mr. Roscoe. Sir."

Just chillin...