Fridge Frequent Flyer Gifts

'I need to do more exercising? Are you kidding?! I'm a kind of marathon runner! I run from the bed to the fridge, then to the table, back to the fridge and then to the TV, back again to the fridge and retour to the TV day by day!'

"So the plan is to fly everyone for free. But we'll charge $400.00 per bag."

Carefree luggage.

'What zip code are we in now?'

"I was going to chuck it all and go to Paris but I didn't have enough frequent-flier miles."

"No luggage to check - I just have this carry on."

A child stands behind a stand piled high with snowballs and a sign that reads "Hand-crafted snowballs 25¢".

Walking Luggage.

Angels await for their baggage around carousels.

'Buying the inflight entertainment system was a great idea of yours, Dear...'

"If God had meant us to fly, he'd give us more leg room!"

'Do you have any specific regulations concerning travelling with pets?'

Child on an airplane wearing a shirt with a switch that says "Airplane mode"

'Sir, will that be business or first class?'

"This bag is carry-on, and this one is kick-drop-throw-and-pile-on."

"Do we have to go to the beach? I think the airline mixed up my luggage."

'We will be 3 minutes late taking off. . . the pilot has to piddle.'

"Think we'll still make happy hour?"

'You sent your wife to get a bottle of wine from the wine cellar? Your jet doesn't have a wine cellar.'

'You want a quick read? How about this one: 'Memoirs of an Amnesic'?'

"At least this year she got rid of the seat belts."

A smiling cyclist

"This seat with extra legroom is great."

A private jet takes off

'...so if we can save enough maybe, just maybe, next year we'll be migrating courtesy of British Airways.'

"I'm afraid there'll be an excess baggage charge on your Filofax."

Airplane Mode.

'We don't know which gate flight 311 to Denver is boarding. These are the menus.'

'At this time, we would like to call those passengers who feel compelled to board before their row numbers are announced.'

'You're off the plane, Hal. Put the laptop on your desk.'

"Passengers, as we begin our descent, you may now suddenly act open and friendly to the person beside you."

"Sorry for the wait. Have you guys been here long?"

'I feel like my ears are about to pop.'

Vaccination Passport

"You shouldn't have stopped to go to the bathroom, sir - you were late claiming your luggage, so we raffled it off."