Friday Fun At Work Pillows

'Will you kindly remind the rest of the staff that I'm the managing director - not the Godfather!'

"You're invited to our management excursion. Come dresses as a pinata."

Desk trays - 'in', 'out', and 'one of these days'.

'Senior management wanted me to raise morale so I made Lionel from accounts 'office jester'!'

'We're just like family. Stop mumbling, Cindy. Straighten up, Fred. Get that hair out of your eyes, Janet...'

'So what do you think of my report, sir?'

"To make this interview more entertaining I would like you to take a breath of helium before answering the questions."

Well, I see Wilcox is finally using his head...as a paperweight!

"As you can see, we have a very flexible work-from-home-at-the-office policy."

'Don't disturb me - I'm in conference!'

We Have A Lot To Cover.....

Our founder: Custard pies Ltd.

'....and that's our CEO. He's trying to find a corporate direction.'

'Many Happy Redundan... HA! RETURNS of the day, Mackay.'

'This is going to be good, he's taking water balloons into the board meeting.'

'I'm playing 18 floors.'

"And that, gentlemen, is the Friday 4.55 pm Bad News Email Dump."

"Apart from that, Bob, what else did you learn on the team-building paintball weekend?"

ROBOT EMPLOYMENT AGENCY, 'We don't have much on hand right now --how'd you like to be a Pez dispenser?'

Office worker chips a golf ball into in tray on a desk at work.

'I don't know what he's doing or why he's doing it, but by golly, I love his work ethic.'

I've refiled all your letters under L.

'Sir, I've got a computer to avoid a giant mess but unfortunately I can't find the computer in this giant mess!'

Friday 5.30pm.

"What's this? Now we have to hunt, gather and collate?"

'If you only learn one thing while you're here kid, remember, the cherry filled ones are mine!'

'I'm surprised the boss isn't in here checking up on us!'

"His tests show he has a latex allergy."

'I should have told you, every Friday senior partners get to do the Prosecco Polonaise.'

When we said we wanted you to have more fun training we didn't mean THAT much fun.

'In case the guys organize a game.'

"105% of the staff who completed 84% of the process were 95% sure that it was a 100% waste of time."

'Gesundheite!'

"Just great...on my first day on the job."

"Yes, it's snowing in my office. Corporate feels utilities, like heat, are a luxury."