Freezer Meal Planner Gifts

'Thaw for 24 hours. They should have told me that yesterday.'

School Cafeteria. It's the start of the school year. The Geometry teacher will come by to verify that we're serving truly square meals. The grammar teacher says the alphabet soup is runny and needs some punctuation added. History teachers keep a record of all the past meals and so will notice any leftovers being served. And the computer lab staff expressed concern about all the cookies so the astronomy teacher suggested switching to candy for dessert. I'll bet she thinks Starburst and Milk

'My diet's good...I'm two weeks ahead of schedule.'

'Like death by salad.'

"Mom, does the Russian borscht you made for dinner give me foreign-policy experience?"

Kiddies Menu for Witches

'Men order. . . women shop.'

"Ok, ok, we'll travel back to dinnertime one more time, but then it's my turn to choose."

The ecumenical dinner party.

"I'm very health conscious. I only eat animals that are vegetarians"

Mrs. Robot attempts to improve her family's diet.

"I think my mom made me a tofu sandwich."

Shopper in grocery store sees TV dinners marked daytime and prime time.

"We're out of today's soup, but you can have tomorrow's soup from yesterday which is the same as today's."

"That's the door to the gym, past all the snack machines."

"To help illustrate our sales plan I have created a pie chart."

"I'm putting you on a high fiber low taste diet."

'I'm saving some for leftovers tomorrow.'

"You have reservations for 7 o'clock? Ideally..."

"What would you suggest as a dinner strategy?"

"I asked folks to bring whatever they want, so now we have ten tubs of guacamole, no chips, and eight cases of the most obnoxiously flavored hard seltzer."

'I'm in the mood to cook!'

'Before you order, perhaps you'd like to discuss your food issues with our eating therapist.'

"Forget George, he scarfs down everything in sight. Aunt Rose and Grandma are good for slipping us a slice. Most important, the kids are sloppy. We're bound to find some juicy scraps under their chairs. Stay alert!"

'How does pizza for dinner sound to you?'

"No dear- I said I was going to buy you a big PROPER TEA!"

A day at the FULL CIRCLE RANCH

'Do you have a traditional Christmas dinner, but for a lacto-vegan fruitarian?'

"What's a good time for dinner, let's sync up our calendars..."

'I put an app on your computer to remove cookies and other thins slowing it down. It's like fiber for your computer.'

"Yes, it was a table for eight, but at the last moment our wives refused to join us."

"No arguing mister! I want you to eat at least one pea!"

"Because we're a family, that's why. You set the table I dial the phone, and your father orders the chinese food."

'How many Breadsticks have you eaten?'

'There was a power failure today - we're having steak, fish, chicken, hamburger, turkey, and pork chops for dinner.'