Meal Planner Gifts

Chicken: Free Range/Long Range

"I'm very health conscious. I only eat animals that are vegetarians"

'I'll have the 800 calorie light lunch special ... four orders.'

'His snacks and his meals are beginning to OVERLAP!'

'Like death by salad.'

Your supper was dinner and orginially lunch

'The ab swing is supposed to come with a meal plan. Check it, cause I need to know if I should eat before my 5-minute workout.'

'I'm in the mood to cook!'

'5 pounds of liver ought to be enough to get your husband to take you out for dinner.'

'Before you order, perhaps you'd like to discuss your food issues with our eating therapist.'

"That's the door to the gym, past all the snack machines."

Roger wouldn't prepare any meal without first consulting his pie chart.

"No dear- I said I was going to buy you a big PROPER TEA!"

'His snacks and his meals are beginning to OVERLAP!'

"I found the offender with a stolen leg of lamb from the supermarket, Sir, and I asked him what he intended on doing with it. . ."

'Hold on, I'm trying to come up with a meal.'

'One down, six to go.'

'My diet's good...I'm two weeks ahead of schedule.'

'There was a power failure today - we're having steak, fish, chicken, hamburger, turkey, and pork chops for dinner.'

'Don't think of it as leftovers -- think of it as a mopping-up operation.'

'Lets do lunch tomorrow.'

'I'm saving some for leftovers tomorrow.'

"What'll I eat, when you, are far away, and I am blue, what'll I eat?"

"Aww, geez. We had dog food LAST night."

"Ok, ok, we'll travel back to dinnertime one more time, but then it's my turn to choose."

School Cafeteria. It's the start of the school year. The Geometry teacher will come by to verify that we're serving truly square meals. The grammar teacher says the alphabet soup is runny and needs some punctuation added. History teachers keep a record of all the past meals and so will notice any leftovers being served. And the computer lab staff expressed concern about all the cookies so the astronomy teacher suggested switching to candy for dessert. I'll bet she thinks Starburst and Milk

I don't understand the economics of it, but I get three square meals a day for chasing frisbees.

Grocery shopper sees TV Dinners and Radio Dinners

'What aren't we eating today, mum?'

'Let me have 20 fat, 40 carbohydrate, 40 protein and a cup of tea.'

'You have to give up power lunches.'

"I'm putting you on a high fiber low taste diet."

'Men order. . . women shop.'

Your Dinner is in the Supermarket.

'I'm cooking tonight. What do you want...three for a dollar or two for eighty-nine?'