Freak Shows Gifts

The Lobster Man - The Sand-Eating Child - The Alligator Lady - The Living Head

Assault 'n' Vinegar

"And now, for your entertainment, I will drink a glass of water while Rempert, here, remains eerily silent."

'You don't have a license and registration, do you?'

Freaks of nature exhibit.

Fred Dinsdale - Forensic expert.

Succession 2

"Where can I find the lefts?"

'It's another cookery programme but It's aimed at children.'

"We've got the same ringtone!" (Two guys opening ring pull drinks cans).

'Guess what I'd like to see disappear next.'

"Agenda item 14 C, does anyone have any idea what happened in Game of Thrones?"

'This has a great ending...he shoots her.'

"When you think about it, you have to be a complete idiot not to believe aliens crashed at Roswell in 1947." "Before 1947: primitive cars, planes, and radio. After 1947: space ships, quantum computing, internet." "Let me try... Before 1947: no bikinis. After 1947: bikinis." "No, wait... The bikini was 1946. That throws this whole theory into question." "We really should have our own science show."

'It's not for acting...It's for a testimony in a courtroom.'

Fire starts at magic show while audience participant is left behind.

'You see son, it's jobs like these that give us a bad name...'

Franz Kafka does stand-up...

Show Jumping Tantrums

"Now that I can watch whatever I want, whenever I want, my life has no structure."

'Gee... Nothing says 'I'm dead' like a severed head.'

"Don't ask where it comes from. Just be glad I can provide."

We really have to stop letting him watch the news.

"We've just crossed the line between binge viewing and OCD viewing."

"According to your resume, your last three employers are some of the biggest crime families on the eastern seaboard. I don't know what position you've applied for, but welcome to the company."

'... And here's one I made earlier.'

'Turn me back into a lovely assistant right now Martin.'

Billy Box lived here...Oh, no he didn't...Oh, yes he did.

Federal witness protection agency.

'My meeting is running a little late, Marge. Can you reheat dinner when I get home?'

'Then I grabbed the ice pick - I mean, pickax. Sorry, I always get those two mixed up.'

The Great Banzinni discovers the oldest trick in the book.

'You and your aversion to needles!'

"The card you are thinking of is... the fifth of Jacks!"

"Hey - didn't I see you on TV last night?"