Fraud Investigation Gifts

Leave one of your names with my secretary.

The Anti-Agent

'You'll like this, gang ? it's an 'eyes-only' list of 'shady-but-tolerated' loopholes allowed by the Securities and Exchange Commission.'

Round up all the king's horses and all the king's men for questioning.

Ducks and hares taken in by a wolf at a seance

There's a crew here from 60 minutes and they're coming this way.

"We'd better watch Cranston. He looks like a whistleblower."

Lady Justice and Confidential Files

"You're either lying or not telling the truth."

MEGASTUDIOS, INC., 'Just think of it -- 'CSI Mayberry,' with Robert DeNiro as Andy and Wesley Snipes as Barney!'

Money laundering - shows money flowing out of US vault.

Fred Dinsdale - Forensic expert.

He's making a list --- Holmes solves cases quicker when he itemizes deductions.

Acme-5000 Lie Detector

'To hear our privacy policy, please tell us you credit card and social security numbers...'

"True crime meets reality TV"

Anderson Cooper as a Kid. Today, an expose that asks the question: Who IS Simon, and why must we do what he says?

Rumors, lies and innuendo.

'Then my brother said he'd like to bury the hatchet...'

Journalism student ponders which course he wants to major in.

'So, in room 1 we sweat them. 2 is for grilling, 3 is for roasting. We leave them to simmer in room 4...'

"The DNA sample from the mink fibres found in the suspect's car matched the DNA sample from the mink coat found at the scene of the crime, so I'm thinking, maybe these minks were twins?"

'I can't believe an Alligator stole my identity... I mean, it's quite obvious I'm a Crocodile!'

"Doesn't look good. The boss just changed his Facebook status to 'Fleeing the country with hookers and compnay 401k plan.'"

"Undiagnosed serial killer"

CSI Wonderland. (Photographer takes a picture of a cracked Humpty Dumpty. Investigators collect evidence from the scene.)

Bribery and Corruption.

Newton's Law and Order.

'That's part of the reason for our problem. We lost the key to the door.'

'Well you checked my £20 note so I'm checking the change you gave me!'

"I'm sorry- when you said 'bad' cop, I assumed you meant incompetent."

Police man stands guard at a murder scene in Egyptology department of a museum.

"They've solved the cause of death of Richard III."

"He did it!"

"According to stomach content analysis he'll be dead in half an hour."