Fortune Tryer Pillows

Stock market books.

'The prevailing wisdom is that markets are always right. I think that luck is always right.'

'The bad news is you're going to marry a geek, and not a pro athlete. The good news is the geek owns the team.'

"You must be cheating - no one's that lucky!"

'Joe has been partying hard!'

A cow goes to the Fortune Teller - 'I can see two all beef patties, special sauce, lettuce, cheese, pickles, onions, on a sesame seed bun...!'

'Can you see the future of my 401(k)?'

'I want to find out what the formula was I wrote yesterday on the blackboard and was erased by the custodian.'

"Mine says this relationship will never work out and I should dump you right now!"

"....and then it turned out that the e-mail I ignored that I got from the Nigerian bank offering me £200 million was REAL!"

'This New Year you will be bathed in a sea of cash!...Hand on...Sorry. This New Year you will need a flea bath for some sort of rash.'

'Don't worry about making your will, Miss Moneybags leave everything to me. . .'

'Come off it-she only said the guys will be fighting over us because you said we lived UNDER a boxing club!'

Made all my investment decisions with a coin flip.

'The crystal ball says to buy and the 8-Ball says to sell.'

Man sees 'Palm Readings and Stock Projections' business window

Gambling on office building construction

Golden Eggs.

'Congratulations! You've just won ten million dollars!'

"Trepanning for gold"

'Risky? Good lord no! We're going to make a fortune!'

Oil explodes from the wishing well.

"I see fleeting moments of happiness in between extended periods of boredom and stress."

'Your life will being when all of your kids are married and the dog dies.'

"He's a widowed eighty-year-old billionaire with a 'Do Not Resuscitate' tattoo...what's not to like?"

Your Palm

"Now...this piece of paper will reveal even more."

"I see a red cape, oh wait, be warned: There's a sword hidden under it!"

"Let's save some time, shall we?... Yes, no, for about five years, since I was a small boy, yes, I can start on Monday. Thanks, bye."

'No, I don't want to change my long distance phone company, and,,, Yes, I should have known it was you calling'

"Forget about tall and handsome. What about portfolio 10 year highs and lows?"

"I see you on a beach..."

Your Winning Lottery Numbers Told: 'If they are really what you say - how come you can only afford a tent?'

'I may charge a lot but you get much more through me. I'm a psychic large.'

"Sometimes I like to think back and reminisce about tomorrow."