Forgetful Gardener T-Shirts

"Remember that half-dead sansevieria you put out on the balcony back in January of 1994, pal?"

"Did you forget to tell anyone to water the garden while we were away?"

Gardener clipping topiary stairs

'Ugh Look The whole garden is just one giant cat toilet'

'The attendant is very good. I tip him the occasional sparrow.'

'Gosh, I dunno. You sure it's organic?'

The Phantom Of The Garden

'I'm in the amusingly shaped vegetables department.'

"The pea's the first vegetable I've ever grown. Can you stuff and mount it for me please?"

'Ah, now's there's something different....'

'He claims to be a recovering workaholic.'

Planting Bird Seed.

City Zoo: 'Try our exotic composts in your garden.'

Half-A**ed Publishing Presents...

"I #*#*#* hate gardening, I'd much rather be at work!!"

"How to deal with weeds."

'I'm out of bags.'

"Gnomeschooling is harder than I thought!"

Sophisticated garden - low maintenance garden

"But you told me you were on gardening leave, so why can't you come and help me in the garden?"

"I might let the window box lay fallow, this season."

"I stopped singing to my plants! I've never had one say 'shaddup!' before!"

'Every summer, dandelions can't wait to go topless!'

'What on earth made you think of growing water melons in the bath Henry?'

How to deal with weeds

'You've never forgotten that Elsie Turner, have you George!'

"Now, that's my kind of gardener: somebody who grows dandelions! I love dandelions..."

Clown watering his flowers.

'Well Miss Pearson, this flood resistant GM Maize you've developed is pure genius. Giving it gills was a masterstroke'

'You're beginning to get the hang of starting the motor, dear, but you forgot one thing...'

Bonsai farms: 'We started growing normal trees, but it didn't work out!'

Football fan

Man with a sunflower head watering flowers with human faces.

Woman Planting Flowers in her Snow Covered Garden.

'Man with birds nesting in hair.'