Forever Planning Gifts

"I do love you, Jack, but I don't want to give birth to your children."

"Looks like we found the issue."

The Department of Really Stupid Ideas: 'Most people think they just appear out of thin air! But the truth is, there's a great deal of very hard work involved!'

"Forget five-year plans. Let's just figure out how to make it to lunch."

"Yes Sir, I'm still working on the 'ins and outs' of their proposal."

"I'm afraid 'It's a surprise', doesn't cut it as a growth strategy."

'I have a plan 'B' but that's also dependent on a working projector bulb.'

"I don't like getting bogged down in details. I'm more of a big-picture guy."

'For your information, I am engaging the energy of change and complexity to create the future I desire.'

"Why can't the rest of you be more like Rollins, here? He does his homework!"

"We only got six days of funding."

Colour Version: Living by the Clock

"Great! I must be growing. The womb was less than half full last week."

Pipe Dream.

'Now I kinda wish we had planned a bigger wedding.'

"Work hard. Save money. Work hard. Save money. Work hard. Save money. Work hard. Save money. Yay!!! I died rich!"

"I spend my day prepping for a good night"

"Honey, you're spoiling that child."

"Would you say that the sales projections in your 3 year plan are realistic?"

"Some day, son, all this will be your ex-wife's."

"Your wonderful daughter and I would like to become engaged in F.Y. '97, married in F.Y. '98, and if the numbers look good, start a family in F.Y. '99."

'Now, keep in mind that these numbers are only as accurate as the fictitious data, ludicrous assumptions and wishful thinking they're based upon!'

"First aid box, puncture repair kit, mobile phone, energy bars and plenty of liquids; I think that's all eventualities covered..."

'Yes, I do have some ideas for the wedding! We could fly in on jet packs, say our vows on a bridge over a piranha pool with you in a white bikini, hold the reception in a casino and honeymoon in a secret underground bunker!'

"Where would you see yourself in five years' time?"

"Doing your homework may lead to a job that has homework."

'Frank built it himself. The last football will fall through the hourglass 10 seconds before the Super Bowl starts.'

"Three more years of high school."

"One year closer to college!"

"For heaven's sake, Ogden, it's vacation time! Must you make your little lists even on vacation time?"

Problem Solving: Man rows desert island to land.

Squirrel putting nuts in a safe box.

Road Forks in the Road: No Way and Yes Way.

'Wow! I never thought it would actually WORK!'

Worry tank