Forest Funster Pillows

"I don't often see you in this neck of the woods."

"Being raised in the city, Fred didn’t quite grasp the true purpose of a game camera."

"I can't imagine why we didn't think of this before."

'Superstock'

"Forget the allowance - I need a benefactor!"

"These few weeks off school have convinced me that I'm definitely a stay-at-home kid."

With Grandpa it was often a game of hide and sleep.

'The puppy just downloaded on your computer keyboard.'

Moo! OOM!

Police Cow!

"You think you hate me now, but just wait until I'm old and a burden to you."

'Before we begin, he's the one that's been helping me with my homework.'

'Look. A mom with a handy carrying case.'

'He takes after your mother' (colour)

"Please let go of Daddy's chest hair."

"Don't stress. My philosophy has always been 'ewe be ewe.''"

"We can do it on the net now... so it's off to the knackery for you."

"How do you like my 'Pop art'?"

'Young Master and I are both turning two: How come I'm so much more mature than he is?'

"A raise? You want me to give you a raise? Do I look like f*ckin' Santa Claus?"

Oh yeah! It does echo when you moo very loudly!

I want to be a lawn!

'That hussy. She's always first in line for insemination.'

'Are you sure it's non-drowsy? I cannot afford to oversleep...'

'...And if that doesn't work, grab your rifle and start blasting away.'

Santa Randy was fired and Santa Claus got the job.

'Not beans on toast again.' - 'No, toast on beans. I dropped it.'

Holy Cow

'I'm still working on my novel. In the meantime, and this is between you and me, I make ends meet by writing all those cat memes you see on Facebook.'

"You spoil that boy."

'Did you know that turkeys and dinosaurs are closely related? Meet my cousin, Lenny!'

'Congratulations Mrs Marrow, it's a courgette.'