Football Gamer Pillows

Unicorn playing Reality Football League

Coach to football players: 'And no cuddling!'

'Wow, the field really is a frozen tundra!'

"Let's go watch TV I hear there are bowl games on."

If nobody had invented graphics

"Do you do temporary ones that last about two weeks?"

Punt Cake

'Originally he was the mascot until we discovered he had a golden foot.'

'I don't understand why you always put me in goal?!'

'How many times have I told you not to hit the ball with your head?'

Football

Bears

"I'm not using my jumper as a goalpost, sir, I'm using it as a jumper."

"Marco ..."

'Yes, Jenny, I know I'm always reminding the team to be good sports, but you really don't have to thank the ref after every call.'

'He's got abdominal pain, dizziness and soreness in his extremities. I'll know more when I see X-rays...'

"To be clear, I said I want your 'A' game, not your 'Eh?' game."

Big screen TV.

'Let's throw ball. Running game not working.'

'And at what stage did you realise the ball you were heading was on the TV?'

'I told him if he didn't get here quick he'd miss out on all the beer and food.'

"All of a dither as per usual!"

'What are we, wimps? Are we gonna let a bunch of rabbits push us all over the field? Come on, big guys.'

"Next time you score show a little respect and don't spike uncle Frank so hard."

"Wanna toss the ol' virtual pigskin?"

"Uptight End"

'Oi, nobody gives me a kiss.'