Foodie With Secrets Gifts

"Stephen and I are today's special."

'..and we thank thee for these bio-engineered vegetables..'

"Monsieur, si vous plaît. I'm sure I ordered the fusilli and not the Fusilier."

'I couldn't stand the heat, so I got out of the kitchen.'

"If you're tired of stegosaur, go kill something else."

"I thought we agreed you weren't going to work at home."

"Are your eel rolls electric?"

"I know, I know, every time we come here, I swear I'm going to try something new, but I always end up getting the same thing."

"That's it. We’re toast."

One Man's Meat is Another Man's Poetry

Kung food restaurant (Waiter flies through the air bringing the food).

"And we are proud to say we only use the freshest artificial ingredients."

"And I'm teaming that burned sausage up with a warm, flat local lager."

-'but for a full English breakfast you can't beat Blackpool,sir.'

'I've already been recruited by one of the top fast-food chains in the country!'

Always empty your fridge before starting a diet.

"The spoon, he ran away with the goddam spoon."

'So tell me why you think you're suffering from seasonal ineffective disorder.'

"Everything tastes better when it's cooked on the grill."

How about going easy on the carbs

'A wheel? No wonder I broke a tooth. I thought it was a donut.'

"You're lost. This is Mom's apple pie."

Famous Jewish Blues Singer Series.

Advocado

"...But ASIDE from that, how was your trip to France?"

Flying sauces.

MUSHROOM MASACRE.

"I wanted to plant my own food, but I couldn't find bacon seeds!"

"Can Johnny come out and eat?"

"At first glance this diet might seem boring but then you realize there are actually seven varieties of kale!"

"Chomp... Chomp... Curry Tree..."