Foodie Voter Gifts

Ranked Voting in N.Y.C.

"I love this place—its food, its ambience, and its political goals."

'Waiter! -- there's a candidate in my soup!'

"Our vegan dishes are the same as what cows eat: Nitrates, Pesticides, Ammonia, Antibiotics..."

Heart Disease Menu

Bedside Manna.

Contaminated eggs? No problem at all!

Party Animal, Party Vegetable, Party Mineral

The Last Dinner

"Were you genuinely interested in where I get my protein, or was it the introductory question to a long and pointless attack on my personal dietary choices?"

'Let's get some lunch in here. I don't trust my gut instincts on an empty stomach.'

"All our water is locally sourced. From a little something we call 'the kitchen faucet'."

"All our ingredients are ethically sourced, so feel free to leave the sh*ttiest tip you can possibly imagine."

Elise Stefanik

"Patient continues to entertain the sincere delusion that apple pie served with a slice of cheese on top is delicious..."

"It's the last of the Chef's Special. He says he'll arm-wrestle you for it."

U.S. Bread Basket.

Once again, the conversation gets too heated, and the selection of a state muffin has to be shelved until next year.

"What's all this fuss about genetically modified food, anyway?"

'This placenta's not very filling, I think I'll nip out for a pizza.'

'Here's a song for all of you who are conflicted over whether or not it's safe to eat genetically-modified food.'

'Keep complaining about my meals and you can fry your own salad!'

'What have you got today?' - 'If you don't smell it, we haven't got it.'

Olympia - Olympics - Sponsored by Ken' Kebabs Food of Champions!

"Now, in addition to our regular programming, let me tell you about tonight's specials."

Demonstration at a bar

"With religion and politics off the table, the only thing left to argue about is gluten."

"And now to present the arguments for chlorinated chicken. . ."

"I don't normally allow it on the first date, but yes, you can take a photo of my meal."