Foodie Monarch T-Shirts

"They don't have a dish named chicken-a-la-queen, do they?"

'Manager. . . Commander. . . Chieftain. . . King!'

'It's the chef's special. His wife just had a baby.'

Self Service Restaurant: 'Where do you keep the eggs?'

'Now that's what I call a kebab... a skewer with whole pies!'

'How about a game of cards?'

'He doesn't ask for a menu... he asks for an estimate!'

Kitchen Kapers

Important Food Groups

Benihana style of cooking.

"Surprise!"

'No, I'm not the sommelier; in fact, I don't even work here - I've just always wanted to try this wine.'

The Streets - Night

Would you be willing to sign something regarding the fat content of your burger? Like what? My colon.

Burnt or Raw?

"Spoiler alert! If you read the specials, you'll find out the Chef's Surprise!"

"Where the hell's my Slinky?"

'The Brothers of the Order of Saint Orson, patron saint of fried foods'

"We add an eighteen percent gratuity for parties of six or more."

'You want to eat out tonight? -- What if we get addicted to good food?'

The Royal Wii

North Fork, the town too tough to diet.

"As you can guess, Rico is my role model."

"Can you reinvent the classic grilled cheese for me?"

Will work for Food Network.

Lion to safari man: 'I'm the king of the jungle and these are my official spokesmen.'

"More croutons, sir?"

Tomorrow we'll cheer the fourth of July! Picnics with families mean hot dogs to buy! Flags will be waving so proudly up high! And fireworks displays will light the night sky which Frank will miss due to way too much pie! Pie Eating Contest!

"How did I find my lamb chop? Well, I lifted up a roast potato and there it was."

Chef's Specials - Hissy Fits, Shouting and Swearing, Pompus Indigestion.

'Would you like that organic, locally grown, carbon neutral, fair trade, trans fat-free, sugar-free, gluten-free and peanut-free?'

Looking tasty

No, sir, that entr

"This is why the doc said to not binge-watch the Eating Channel!"

'For Heaven's sake Son, you're embarassing me! This is a feeding frenzy!'