Foodie Fails Fans Pillows

Cafe Burns.

HELLth Food Sprouts

'I burned my fingers by touching the hot breakfast eggs, but next time, I'll peel them before I put them into boiling water!'

Cuckoo has got halfway through it's call and then had an arrow shot at it.

'My French is not so good.'

"He's a fussy eater."

"I'm a vegan. I don't know what made me order a cheeseburger. Maybe I've got the flesh eating disease."

"Dear Mum, please stop sending me food parcels..."

I've got to run to my job interview! Do I have spinach between my teeth?

I feel like I'm starting to hate everyone, doc. Dr. Noodle. I hate the stranger who shook his head in disgust at me when he saw I was in an interracial relationship. I hate the lady who cut me off in traffic and almost ran me off the road this morning. I hate the dentist who convinced me I needed a $350 mouth guard when I could've bought one just as good for $25 at Target. I hate the girl scout who sold me six disgusting boxes of ten-year-old Samoa cookies. That's ... ten? I hate myself for not

'This restaurant has got zero stars, right? Every single one of them is well deserved.'

"You asked me to keep a food diary, this is last week's!"

'How can anything this bad be fattening?.'

"Fred? Can you help me? I'm really in a jam."

"Combination No. 5--no MSG."

What do you mean it's not vegetarian? The maggots all jump out...

'Now that I can afford anything on the menu, I can't digest anything on the menu.'

After standing on the scales Claire decided to stamp on the diet book.

"Oh God, I forgot to ask if anybody had lard issues."

"Careful, I'm spilling your shrimp bisque all over the place."

'Allors Monsieur, let's see... one fish meal... one phone call for the ambulance... that'll be 79,70.'

"I'm spending too much money on food. But what can I do? The kids won't eat anything else."

I'm still hungry. Go back four seconds.

A man and a woman on a date have a fish head and tail for dinner.

'How many times did I tell you 'Don't eat the free samples given out on the street!'?'

"There could be a table in your future - or - dessert in someone else's."

"It's horrible. Well, I share my food...on social media."

"A tip?... Yes, I'll give you a tip. Never eat here, the service is terrible!"

Man faced with a fridge full of food can't find the dinner left for him by his wife

'Not only our fishcakes, Granny Cora herself was recalled. She's not really a Granny.'

A man's instant camera picture falls into his soup.

"You need to disable cookies and pizza and ice cream and..."

'I'll take the rest of this in a doggy bag.'

Man suffering terrrible cramps at dinner

Cook struggles to open sauce jar.