Food Satirists Pillows

'Ill have the salad. But could I have it made out of chocolate?'

1990's themed restaurant - 'Twizzlers'.

Lesser known greek gods,

"War is hell and so is this soup."

'Be honest. Does this double bacon cheeseburger with large fries and shake make me look fat?'

"I feel like we are the polyester of dairy products."

Health and Safety Gone Mad.

"I read somewhere that truffles are a gateway fungus."

Garlic Free Zone.

'I think it's more than a coincidence that I discover fire, and my wife discovers burnt food on the same day.'

"I'll have the spaghetti, does that come on toast?"

"Can you turn these mashed potatoes into french fries?"

"The salad should be delicious. We ordered it with lots of extra bacon bits."

"Waiter, there's a hare in my salad!"

Cat eats date.

'I take it that the birthday cake is for this old trout you just served me?'

Fly Tastings: 'Notice that hint of dog fur and then let that full bodied garbage finish unfold.'

'Look, I know it's artificial orange, but you're sick, I say, sick.'

Cupcake jumps out of cake.

'The Specials are the same as the Main Menu dishes, but with more florid descriptions.'

'Remember to eat your 500,000 a day son!'

'Well you said you wanted sushi for lunch.'

Tuna Salad, Meat Loaf, Cheese Omelet and Bean Soup

'If you order...You can digest it in...'

"Actually, it wasn't so bad. One minute I was standing in line at the slaughterhouse...The next thing I knew, I was being basted in my own juices..."

"If we crunch the numbers, it should have zero calories."

'Mustard, ketchup and mayo are all nice and creamy smooth. Why isn't anything being done about relish?'

The leaning tower of Pizza.

The world's worst restaurant. Now under new bad management.

"I just explained 'kugel' to him."

"Sorry Sir, but what exactly were you expecting to be served when you ordered the 'early bird special'."

"Cut down on the pumpkin spice."