Food Photography Fan Pillows

I have so many pictures of food on my phone, it doesn't ring, it belches.

"I'm posting it on my facebook page."

"Just bring me something that's going to look good on social media."

"Yo, Cézanne, paint faster. I need those grapes for the Madeira sauce."

'You realize we're only having three people over...'

"I chose to stand up to special interest groups!"

The Coffee Shop Vats of New Jersey

"Waiter, can you heat this up? The wild salmon got cold while I was posting it to Instagram."

"Tia Carmen's not happy unless she can send people away with a plate of leftovers for the road."

Party time.

"Baby Jackson Pollock"

"What time did you say you wanted me to start drinking?"

"We've misjudged the tapas again."

"Your meal sounded nice."

"I'll be glad when the television is fixed."

You're the sizzle in my roast!

Dad's old fashioned barbeque

"This deserves an Instagram photo. Would you mind taking a picture of someone washing the dishes when I'm done?"

Thermidor Dali

"The special is… pine nut encrusted… filet of salmon… in a balsamic wine reduction."

"This crew gets 15 miles to the pound of gruel. They're very fuel efficient."

"May I recommend our Seared Filet with Lobster Cream Sauce? It's very photogenic."

'I decided to start buying food in bulk. I hope you're hungry!'

Avocado Timeline

'Are you sure these sprouts aren't GM?.'

'Pumpkin pie isn't dessert. It's another vegetable.'

"My instagram feed is basically people, dog food, and tennis balls."

Snacks for Learners

"Ooh, that looks delicious! Does it photograph well?"

As soon as he began speaking Manuel's Spanish accent was unmistakeable and he was evicted from the Local food group.

"He'd like the broiled monkfish, too, but first he's having a quick taste of the gutter."

"I'll have the sticky rack of ribs for my main course and something vegan for my Instagram post."

"And this is my oldest son I was telling you about. The one that eats like a horse."

'Amazing this pizza looks just like a brain scan of someone who's experiencing apophenia'