Food Naming Enthusiast Pillows

"It's macaroni. We all it pasta as a marketing ploy."

"Behold! As I transform this family size frozen lasagna into a meal for one."

'And though he died during the hunt, we can only assume that George L Jones would want this new species of butt-faced clown monkey to forever bear his name.'

Baptism Then and Now

Naming that Impala

"I'm not a food critic I'm a literary critic and I've found the prose on your menu to be second-rate."

'Then again, who says we can't call it a mangelwurzel?'

Schoolgirl in canteen: 'The food's great but I wish they'd stop calling it 'pukka tukka'.'

Changing house name.

'Chefs, the secret ingredient for tonight's competition is - wing of bat!'

'Aren't they wonderful? And your wife's already named them John and Edward.'

Tofu: Firm, Soft, Amusingly Jiggly

"We're for calling it 'Hampton,' but they want to call it 'the Hamptons.' "

'Why did Tarzan name his chimp cheetah?'

"You say 'potato' I say 'dehydrogenated on vegetable flavoured product enhancer.'"

'Mozart...as your agent I strongly advise against your choice of stage name...'

Little Jimmy Harmon: first to amplify the sparerib

'We can call it a library, a media center or a resource room, but we are not going to call it an internet cafe.'

"I'd like to know who the heck was in charge of the naming!"

Aesthetic Pioneers

"My master has trouble making a decision."

'We've decided to call her 'Whiskers'...'

"... stearic acid, amylase, sodium stearoyl lactylate and — hold on. What in the world is C-I-L-A-N-T-R-O?"

'Looking back, maybe I shouldn't have called you 'Flash'. It just seems sarcastic now.'

'This chicken was raised on a farm, ate corn and never consumed drugs. That's more than I knew about you when we dated.'

"Find one that uses only A, D, G, I, M, N, T and will be easier for him to text her when she's a teenager."

'How am I meant to be a lean mean rodent killing machine with a name like 'Twinky'!'

'Caution: this tomato soup combines with our chicken noodle soup can form a lethal nerve gas.'

'If you really loved me you'd never have called me Euthanasia!'