Follicle Philosopher Pillows

"Do you want it parted in the middle?"

"Hey... Where'd everybody go?"

"Yeah, but I hear they're even uglier without the hair."

'The hair specialist is down the hall.'

'How would you like your hair Sir? Up? Down? Flying around looping the loop or defying the ground?'

Your male pattern baldness is partly genetic and partly hereditary.

"The combover works even less now that you're using your back hair."

"Wait... what was it I came up here for?"

"Be creative...!"

Cars follow the sign to the mall rather than the sign to the manger.

'He wants some hair restorer for his birthday.'

Park cleaner orders leaf to come down.

'You're out of '50 Great Years of Mindless Consumerism?' How about 'Celebrating America's Shopping Malls?' That one, too?'

Rodin's 'The Thinker' imagines himself as Rodin's 'The Kiss'.

"What should I say this is about?"

"Maybe he's waving and drowning."

'No matter how hard I work, I'll never get higher on the food chain then this?'

Toupee in a tin.

'I've been under a lot of pressure.' (Diver on therapist's couch).

Conflict is harder to sustain when you don't see everything in black and white.

'What does Easter mean to you?'

Male Mid-Life Myth--The Hair Fairy

"Brenda's always been a bit of a worrier."

'Darn! - Don't you hate it when you forget what you were meditating about?'

'I don't think much of your work experience scheme Eric!'

'How long has it been since you had a shearing?'

The Discovery of the Principle of the Parachute during a landslip in the Apennines

"They're all down there sentenced to an an eternity of fornication, licentiousness and intoxication."

Caution: Perfectionists at Work Next 1/4 Mile.

No Easy Answers

'I'm prescribing Rogaine for your head and Roloss for your back.'

"Not too much off the top, Floyd!"

'Yin... Yang... Yin... Yang....'

"Just take a little off the top!"

"I'm leaving my subconscious to science."