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A vampire in a canoe.

"Waste of money, I've been here 200 years and never yet seen a monster."

'Hello, I'm your new neighbour. May I borrow a cup of sugar, please?'

"Rapunzel, you've let me down, you've let your mother down, and now you've let your hair down."

Astronaut finds used firework on the moon.

"This is the worst gum disease I've ever seen...I'd suggest you eat more vegetarians."

'We wish you well.'

'I've got a receding hairline!'

Pirate sees man on toilet sign has peg leg

Saint George's Day: 'You can understand why they made him England's Patron Saint.'

'Little Hans here says he knows how to help stem the rising tide of consumer indifference.'

The Sky is falling...Now and Then.

Stone Hen

Robin Hood sits at desk near two work boxes. The in box contains arrows with messages attached, the out box, just arrows.

"Those tights pinch and chaff. We're going commando."

Rob Roy

The truth behind Bigfoot

William Tell Overture

"Oh, this? Crazy story..."

'Never MIND what Lady Godiva does!'

"Woah, woah, woah....Did you just call me abominable?"

Grimm's Fairytales - The Turnip; Student Tricked into 'Sack of Knowledge'

Paul Bunyan gets the leg-lengthening Operation

And that, son, is why I don't let you play football.

"No, let down your hair!"

"I guess I'm more of a why-wolf."

"Win, but make it close."

"Why, all the better to...nah you're right - that's pretty incriminating."

"All I got was a cake and a card."

"I invested all my gold into NFTs."

"... And this one needs a shot of vodka."

"No squirrel, but I found Jimmy Hoffa."

"I'm not a fish, but thanks for catching me."

"I think they should appoint a special prosecutor to see how we got into this mess."

"This next one is called 'The Sermon on the Mount.'"