Focus Group Philosopher Gifts

'I thought you did fine, but I'm afraid you didn't test well with the focus group.'

"It turns out crows find a bunch of dead crows more frightening than a man made out of hay."

'Before we start, would everyone please put your cell phone in the middle of the table?'

"Forget it - she's out of your league."

'The hardest thing is convincing the wife that when I'm staring out of the window I'm actually composing a tweet.'

Meekness of Mr Pecksniff and his Charming Daughter

"It helps me stay focused."

"I had the stitches out last week. I just find that it helps me stay focused."

"So we all love Cuddly Poo, but to cover ourselves, better run it by day care."

Grass: We lost some good men today!

"What do you mean, we don't have an 'exit strategy'?!"

"You forgot to adjust your hilling discs again, didn't you?"

Dept. de Philosophie

"We've checked, and it's fine with women."

"Hey - let's not us re-invent wheel."

'Is this where they're conducting the focus group?'

"Essentially people find cat's cuter"

Focus Group: "Better or worse? How about now? Better or worse?"

"That's the danger of mono tasking...you're too easily held accountable."

'Care in the Online Community.'

"Of course we employ the disabled. Halve the staff here are not able to get to work on time, the rest are not able to focus on the job."

Poet and Peasant

'...and so I say without fear of contradiction...'

The focus group thinks it's time you got rid of the beard.

'Relax, I just wanted to know if you wanted to break for lunch.'

"You don't mind distractions as much as me, so I didn't think you'd mind if my kids played in your office today."

"We're migrant coffee table dwellers, and we adore the unassuming simplicity of your lounge."

'Sure, I took your shovel. Ethics doesn't kick in for a year or two.'

Dear Forum, thou was on yon Saturday - A literary type writes into the lads' mags.

"Helen, I really wish you would respect my creative process."

"How was your lonely little dinner, sir?"

You'd be surprised at the number of disruptive participants we get at these focus groups.

"Yes, we blieve that the earth is flat..."

The focus group hated it. So he showed it to an out-of-focus group.

Ladies, we are victims of our own success!