Flooring Fanatics T-Shirts

"Do you prefer the tile engineered to look like wood, or the wood engineered to look like tile?"

Shoe addict.

'Hang on a second, I think I have a sand castle in my shoe.'

'I just finished the floors, so they better stay clean!'

'We've moved some fussy people, but she tops it!'

'OK, the worn out carpeting proves I snack too much. Only one thing to do. Tomorrow I get prices on hardwood floors.'

Gianni Tatti's Dining-Room Chair

Maria had always said you could never have too many shoes. Actually, she was wrong.

'Hello, Acme Termite Control...?'

'Ooh, hey...real hardwood floors!'

"This was probably an early Father's Day gift."

"Dear, you are Definitely coming back as a centipede."

Daniel Day Lewis & George Glasgow

"Doctor Scholl and Mr. Hyde."

"The hardest thing about learning to tumble is the floor."

Ten business commandments, city trading floor

"I've decided to replace the sod floor with tile."

"We're thinking Shag Carpet. I'm tired of hardwood floors."

Mischievous Pets

"Bailey! What part of 'never jump on the Stickley' don't you understand?!"

Memory Foam Mattress.

'That was some varnish remover!'

"I know they're expensive, Evelyn, but like the saying goes...If the Jimmy Choos fit, wear them!"

"These are the least elegant one's in stock!"

Fissure waxing - Department of Seismology.

"Jeffrey makes all our furniture himself."

Budget Recliner

"I'm sorry, madam, but these units are for display purposes only."

Reproduction Furniture

"Many of the dioramas were completely renovated in the '70's."