Floor Plan Aficionado T-Shirts

"No, you didn't actually invent the open concept floor plan."

"I spilled a red dot of paint, so I painted the whole room so you wouldn't notice it."

'Is that the only wallpaper you could find?!'

Adhesive Tiles: Do Not Open from this End.

A man is living in small box apartment trying to read a book, but is surrounded by people engaging in noisy activities.

Fittd shēt

Waiting Room Quarterly

"Except for that wall socket, the whole damn thing is a trompe-l'oeil."

Five Ideas For Success: Always finish what you. . .

'OK, the worn out carpeting proves I snack too much. Only one thing to do. Tomorrow I get prices on hardwood floors.'

"Do you prefer the tile engineered to look like wood, or the wood engineered to look like tile?"

'Hello, Acme Termite Control...?'

"Whether we refer to them as lakes or ponds, it's mere semantics."

'For heaven's sake Janet - where have you disappeared to now?'

"I see no problems. We can get lots more of these houses in.."

Waiting to do the second coat was the worst part. It was like watching paint dry.

Summertime... When you go zero to 'booked up' in 3.5 seconds

"I worry about you, Dinkins. . . you seem to be losing the big picture."

"I need an apartment just big enough for a laptop, a coffee cup, and me."

Yellow Fever: What you may catch if your painter sneezes.

"Hmmm. Not sure it will go with my wife."

'It's a new concept, the inside out house.'

Angry boss

Trouble Ahead

"I've decided to replace the sod floor with tile."

"We're thinking Shag Carpet. I'm tired of hardwood floors."

'You've got to give her points for originality.'

"Could I have another quick look at your references, Barker?"

"If you need me, I’ll be in the living room clawing the bejesus out of that Navajo rug you just picked up at auction."

'I've just found out we make cubicles.'

'That was some varnish remover!'

'We can't get enough of these makeover shows.'

"You're not thinking about redecorating again, are you?"

"The building is fully renovated with VR in every unit...let's put these on to view the kitchen."

"Darling, a rather uncomfortable distance has developed between me and the furniture."