Flood Fighter Pillows

"Yes, Mr. Willis, it's definitely rising damp."

'If you can smile when everything around you is going wrong... you're probably in the repair business!'

"This is a fine time to remember you forgot to pay our homeowner's insurance!"

'This place has been bailed out more often than Greece.'

''Go with the flow' may be a bad way to put it.'

'Should we upgrade the levees or just go hydroponic?'

'It's the plumber ... '

Pet fish flooding the house.

"Actually we were hoping for something a little more sensible..."

"Put these life jackets on and go to the higher part of the house. Daddy isgoing to try to fix our plumbing problem himself."

"I can see our house from here."

Texas is drowning.

"You should have called earlier."

"Ned is getting ready for the oceans to rise."

"We have to recognise that severe weather events are becoming more common. . ."

"Looks like we may be in for more rain!"

"Well, we didn't get the new flood barrier!"

"I just got a text message from our dehumidifier. It says it doesn't know how much more of this rain it can take."

Fields too wet? One solution...

Cyclone Sandy

Flood victims.

'The good news, is that the water in your cellar isn't due to a leaking pipe.'

Official in flooded office says: 'A decision on lifting the hosepipe ban will be made in due course.'

Master Plumber

'Now I have TWO drips, bonehead!'

'It's a very nice house, when the tide is out.'

"I thought them scientists were gonna fix this?!"

'No, you're the plumber, you go and check how bad the leak is.'

To wet to cut the grass

A friend in need is a friend indeed.

'Is that the water authority? Can I use my hosepipe to pump out the basement?'

"I intend to stay in this job, come Hell or high water."

"What's the response here to increased risk of flooding due to climate change?"

"We'll always have Paris..."

"...and exactly how long are your parents planning on staying?"