Flock Enthusiast Gifts

"I'm here about the found poster."

'Isn't that cute! They're thanking us.'

"Instead of taking a bath can I wear a flea collar?"

Bad Interview Technique

Grandpa gets more than he bargained for when his lawnmower takes flight as a helicopter would.

"I am wearing sunglasses and using sunscreen with 50% UV protection. What could possibly go wrong?"

Neil Young

"Well they are fake ducks, Honey, but not quite decoyish enough."

'I've got'em right where I want'em.'

"It feels good to finally get my feet wet."

'...Stop trying to funk it up.'

'All my children have been successful. Frank here is in the Oval Office.'

Basic economy

"Orange juice, 1/2 lb. bacon, dozen eggs, bread, coffee..."

'I brought in a big order and my boss gave me a feather for my cap.'

'And it looks like the refs are going to call a hard fowl.'

"Bandit is very sorry about your expensive drone and wants to say it will never happen again."

"Sorry, nature calls, I'll be back in five minutes: Suzie, you're in charge..."

Goose gaggle giggle: 'Tee hee! Tee Hee!...'

'Is this your first Henley Regatta?'

'Your dog or mine?'

'You don't want to show favouritism Bruce-it upsets the others.'

'I'd like to spend November and December in a nice vegetarian country!'

'He was born to the sea.'

"No wonder it's itchy: You have a whole flea circus on your back!"

'I've thought the same thing myself. He certainly doesn't look like any of us.'

'Well, we just became unspectacular.'

Man on a flying machine amongst a flock of birds.

Vampire

Four fleas line up for a race on a dog: 'Hey, did you hear about Frank... he was scratched!'

'Sheep-dogs give me the creeps: I can't tell if they're watching me or not...'

"I think Maurice has gone feral."

'I have no idea how many I have in my flock. Every time I start counting them I fall asleep.'

'It's really getting crowded around here! I think we should move to a larger dog.'

'Huh! There goes Sunday lunch!'