Fitness Challenger Pillows

'Irregular heartbeat. Due to irregular exercise.'

'The other foot also Mrs Zipsky!'

Unflexible man puts shoes on stall to touch his toes.

"Chubby! Who the hell is Chubby?"

All Snack Foods 1/2 off. Every time I try to fight temptation, temptation fights dirty!

"This sedentary desk job makes history come alive. I fight the Battle of the Bulge every day."

'What makes you so sure this is good for my health?'

'Well I haven't had a change to review all you readings in depth, but if I were to be forced to make an education guess I'd day that your knackered.'

'Your fitness regime hasn't worked headmaster. The gym floor collapsed.'

"I don't think there's anything wrong with your fitness watch: It's just that you haven't moved enough to trigger it..."

"My smart car must sense we're out of shape. Why else would it drop us off here and tell us to walk?"

"Moving to a chair to eat three times a day really isn't 'doing sit-ups!'"

"We have to walk, it's part of the governments solution to the obesity crisis."

'Personally I take all these programmes with a pinch of salt.'

"Mating dance? Good luck with that. I couldn't even get my husband to do the chicken dance at our wedding."

"Fine - you don't want to run in the corporate 5K - I get it. What about the corporate cage fighting team?"

'Well, this is a first †he's got repetitive motion syndrome from eating!'

Do not think outside the box!

"Yoga helps me unwind."

"I'm trying to gain 10 pounds before midnight so I can keep my resolution to lose 10 pounds next year."

'You put him on a diet, so he put you on a diet.'

Empty Calories Vending Machine.

'This game is going to be a character-building experience.'

Please seat to be weighted.

'If you don't plan on snacking in between meals, then why did move the fridge in here?'

'You know that thin person inside you, struggling to get out? -- He seems to have gained weight, too.'

"Touch that and you're a dead man."

'It's the half-empty bag of cookies from the back of the pantry. Should I tell them you'll call back?'

Mr Muscles competition

'I am a staving artist. I'm fat because all I can afford is junk food!'

The cake diet.

How's My Jiving?

We're never going to lose weight if we don't get rid of the fridge light.

'I reduce my stress with comfort food. Now none of my clothes are comfortable.'

'...all been inspired by the Olympics...now touch those toes...touch those...'