Fitness Advisor Pillows

Ask Sadie. Dear Sadie, My husband hates to exercise since it makes him sweat. How do I tell him to shape up? Thanks, SV. *Actual reader question. Haven't you read the scientific research, lady? Exercise is one of the worst things you can do for you body. It leads to pain, sweating, muscle ache, weight loss. On the other hand, research also shows the great health value of yelling at your husband and telling him he's a lazy wretch! The science is divided on the question. One of the great joys of b

"No, Harry, shaking ketchup on your burger and chips twice a day cannot be counted as exercise."

"Approaching 10,000 steps."

"I hope you are enjoying the walk..."

Man on exercise bike with dog on treadmill

'Maybe we should have gone for a pommel horse.'

"Do you guys serve beer?"

'Okay, ladies! We're not just going to burn those calories, we're going to drown them!'

"All I do is swim and eat plankton, but do I lose weight?"

"A squirrel, impressive! I'm still chasing a stick."

"Things are still a little rough for me, and occasionally I lose hope and get depressed—but I'm getting stronger every day."

Be Healthy

On the back of the t-shirt...

'Not that sort of body building program!'

'Run, run, as fast as you can!'

'Hang in there, Larry, those endorphins will soon kick in.'

'I never should have ordered the diet platter.'

"They met in the express-checkout lane at the A.&P. and have slowed down only occasionally ever since."

"It's a new work-out video. It shows a mother chasing after three little children all day."

'I feel like exercising. Have you seen my tennis shoes?'

'Twenty years ago I began jogging five miles a day - could you tell me where I am?'

The Gospel According To Jane Brody"Orange, come in. Apple, come in. Hey you, frankfurter, hold it right there."

The rock caricature

Man using exercise bike being chased by dog

"O.K. you're ready to go on to the less embarrassing weights."

"I work out in preparation for being out of shape for the next 30 years."

Running

"Wait! Don't start the chase now: I need to stretch first!:

"Migration ruins my 10,000 steps."

"We hang like this for the incredible ab workout."

"Breathe in and reimagine yourself in a world where you lived a healthy lifestyle."

Brad Pitt

Yoga.

"Right now Arnold Schwarzenegger is doing sit-ups."

"My diet plan for you is if it tastes good, spit it out."