First Reading Experience Gifts

"I think oral sex is when they just talk about it."

'Peter the Flying Hippo is my favorite storybook character without any merchandising tie-ins.'

'Are you sure I should read my book report to the class? --�It's PG-13.'

Cat rolls up yarn like power cord.

Biggles has a more staid adventure.

"I'm still pre-literate."

"I'll be honest... there are books by James Joyce that are easier to follow than these bad boys."

'Second grade. When did you discover 'LMNOP' wasn't one letter?'

'Neither a lender nor a borrower be.'

A man with Dwarfism is reading Little Women.

"My favorite part of the story was when Prince Charming kissed Sleeping Beauty and she totally rebooted."

"We don't have to worry about being quiet until we're old enough to read that sign."

"When Mom reads that story, the dragon comes off as a much more sympathetic character."

Little boy reading a classic whilst his Dad reads a comic.

A man and his dog both reading.

Bug reading book has antennae that are lights.

Micro-Brewed Brain Beer

'It doesn't take much to please him these days.'

Monster Self-Help

'Don't worry, he'll soon grow into it.'

"At least she's reading."

'I'm pretty sleepy tonight, Dad - could we just skip ahead to the chase scene?'

'I can't remember the title, but it began, 'Once upon a time'...'

What do you mean, you like me. We're love birds!

Man sees book flying in the Mystery section.

'Jack wants to stay home and rad books, and I wanted him to take up roller skating, so we compromised.'

"Think about the perks. You learn to read, you get a pre-approved library card!"

"First the lady asks if I want to take this book...then she says I have to bring it back in two weeks!"

Flower lamp.

'Caution: Channeling Haruki Murakami.'

Maybe I'd better write a thank you letter for the Last Supper after all

Two bedbugs after a tryst.

"They've worked out the can save money by sharing toilet reading material."