First Meeting Of Friends Gifts

"We met online."

"I invited a few friends over who think you should see a psychiatrist."

"Yes, I'm from London. 'Which part?' you ask. Well all of me!"

"The trend in tough economic times is to put off everything that doesn't require immediate action ? as this chart shows."

'Now, keep in mind that these numbers are only as accurate as the fictitious data, ludicrous assumptions and wishful thinking they're based upon!'

'I like you, you remind me of someone.'

Can I give you a slice of the action?

Networking

'You'll enjoy our staff meetings. We always begin and end with the product.'

Emotional Bling

Andy Oxidant meets Free Radical.

"Passengers, as we begin our descent, you may now suddenly act open and friendly to the person beside you."

'Next!'

'Couldn't you think of anything to say to Herb and Mary? They were nice enough to invite us over.'

"Hey guys - wrote a new song! It's called 'I suggested Paris.' And a' one, two three..."

'I was attracted to you but your online photo, but now that I've seen you in High-Def...'

'Okay, but not in person -- I prefer on-line dating.'

Love at First Sight.

Girl to girl: 'A friend is someone you don't have to call dibs with.'

'I'm looking for male bonding, but I'm a little rusty.'

'I've met you before...I'm not good with names, but I never forget a pace!'

"Tell me about yourself. Any weird genes or anything?"

"I've been invited to two different thanksgivings...One with family, one with friends, which one do I go to?"

'If you'll excuse me, I'm going to work the room.'

Little boys

'Right, moving on to the housekeeping...'

'I don't like her line of gossip - it's never about anyone I know.'

"Our first order of business will be the new speed bump in the parking lot."

'Hey hon, everyone and their dog is here!'

"Can you tell me the story again about how you swiped right on Dad?"

'For goodness sake, will we ever have a nice picnic without family and friends turning up uninvited?'

'Actually thursday'll be a perfect time to come by Penny. That way you'll finally get the chance to meet my other half.'

'Mr. Bigmeister likes to start each meeting with the pledge of allegiance.'

"Oh don't mind us, we are just having a small get together!"

"Is that 'good reptilian' or 'bad reptilian'?"