First Home Buying T-Shirts

"Kids say the finniest things."

'And if you look to your left between the condos and the ABD store, you can see the ocean.'

"Liable to flooding? Whatever gives you that idea sir?"

"I'd better enjoy this while I can. It's the only home I'll own without a mortgage!"

Man sees sign stating dog for sale, house and land thrown in.

"We balanced our budget this month!"

"I always thought of my childhood home as being larger."

"I'm afraid the price would make him toss and turn all night for months!"

"Well, we're down to bare brick, natural wood, and raw nerves."

'You had to put a skylight in didn't you?'

"Son, one day two hundred square feet of this city could be yours to rent."

Do you like to talk about Real Estate? Like to meet other men and women who do? Dial the... REAL-ESTATE HOTLINE

"Sold For sale Ellie Kopp 1-800-238-7463 Yaffle Realty Stop renting. Buy your boot from a boot."

"Do you prefer the tile engineered to look like wood, or the wood engineered to look like tile?"

'C'mon! Speed it up! I've got a bottle of wine here that says it's meant to be drunk soon!'

"Yes, we’d like to buy a grow house." "Chia Pet’s first purchase."

"May I recommend THIS property? It's ideal for first-time haunters..."

'Can we call a realtor now?!'

Estate Agent showing client his parents' house - '...and here's one from our affordable homes range'

'Oh look, the tide is coming in.'

"This condo includes free access to fitness facilities...7 flights of stairs."

'The owner plays in the NBA.'

"Mom, could we stay in my old room until we're able to afford a place of our own?"

Realtors: 'We make house calls'.

I'm buying a house. You're broke. So? the interest rate plans are amazing. The banks are giving money away. Besides, the housing market is going nuts. If I buy today, I can sell next year for a huge profit. I suddenly feel faint. You look ill, Mr. Powell.

Estate Agent - This house that's 'just what we are looking for' is ours

'Honey, I'm home.'

'We did have one property in your price range, but I'm afraid we sold it in 1943.'

'We do have a property in your price range, but we need a time machine to go back and visit it!'

'I see a carefree lifestyle by a quiet lake. No, wait, my mistake - looks like I called up the real estate section.'

'The owners are a bunch of clowns.'

'And the funniest part is I made Frank go out and buy a new, $5,000 fridge, just to hold a $4.00 bottle of wine!'

'The only means of access was via the previous tenant's hair. But not to worry, there's a ladder 'round the back.'

'What makes you think the basement leaks?'

Hello, Mr. and Mrs. Sebum! I think you'll love this property on the left side of the chin. It's a wonderful place to start a pimple."