Fireplace Technician T-Shirts

Beginning fires for the winter - Something wrong with the chimney.

Chimney sweeps.

Good News about winter

'Garfield has told the oil companies to go to hell.'

'ACE Heating and cooling' 'What's Hot' 'What Not'

'Now, remember...let me do the talking.'

Fred deciding which sort of power to use to cut wood for his wood burning air conditioner.

'... and power outages on really hot days don't affect this baby one bit.'

Relaxing in front of a fire.

"OK then, I admit it. Installing the log burner was a bad idea!"

"If history has taught us anything, it's taught us that there have been a ridiculous number of books written about history."

Open Mike for the spotlight operators

"The pH level seems a little off."

Bio Fuels.

"To keep warm in winter you're looking at a new central heating system costing £20,000."

'Your husband started without me, didn't he?'

Natural gas

'I know that it's the Fourth of July, but I still don't think an air conditioner is supposed to do this.'

It's an iphone rehearsal.

Energy Conservation Be Damned. Fred constantly prepared for Global Warming and Nuclear Winter to happen at the same time.

Portrait sweating above a fireplace

"Who wants to help me with the fireworks this year?"

'Sorry, I'm afraid it was a false alarm. It turns out that 'the emergency gas leak' was my husband.'

'The fire seems to be drawing well.'

'Anyway, you look wonderful. Mind if I ask who does your lighting?'

Scotland Yard - coal heavers singing in a public house

An Eskimo sits in a melting igloo, as a central heating van drives away.

Igloo with Heat Pump

"It just doesn't crackle like the one on Netflix."

"Richard P. Ruggles—a man and his mantelpiece."

"You may be the CEO, but I control the thermostat in your office."

The sound of a crackling fire licking at seasoned logs...

Two Cats 'I just love curling up without a good book.'

Now that we can't afford heating oil our pension check is finally good for something.

'Steam from the boiler turns the turbine which then powers the air conditioner.'