Fire-ready Foodie Gifts

'Better lay an extra place for the fireman, dear!'

Barbequer wears apron with 'Beer in -beer out' slogan.

"When you say that love is in the air, you're referring to the smells from the food trucks, right?"

Sausages.

"Vindaloo hot enough?"

'Now Featuring Gas-Fired Microwave Campfires!'

"Lori, out here it's my kitchen!"

Holiday Supplies

'Any wilderness skills besides making smores?'

Moses uses the burning bush to roast a kosher frank

"Can we set the flame to a medium high?"

Pan Extension Chord

"I said, 'Fetch Chardonnay,' not 'Riesling.'"

"I hope you're not using any of the canned food I so diligently stockpiled.

"Yes, we're stranded here... but think how healthier we are eating nothing but fish!"

'Gary freaked out a bit and went way off the griddle.'

Cannibal recipes.

Pizza Rescue.

"Appetizer is almost done."

"The stranger came bearing gifts of graham crackers and chocolate. No one suspected the murder weapon he hid behind his back until..."

'I told you rosemary and sage, but don't add the garlic until the last half hour.'

Emergency box in woods contains supplies for a campfire.

'It doesn't say anything....They're having a barbecue!'

"I'm calling it Cajun Blackened Chicken!"

Listen, I'll put chocolate chips in your flapjacks, too, but I ain't makin' smiley faces with 'em.

"So here we are...the great outdoors!"

"I'm sleeping in today. I got in late from last night's orgy."

'You poached the rabbit in white wine, and poaching's a $250 dollar fine.'

First Responders - Second Responders.

'When it comes to our Boef flambe safety is paramount.'

Paterfamilias makes himself independent of hotels

"You boys might as well dig in - this could smolder for days."

Another Rookie Mistake

"Fire down."

Rotisserie Chicken Rope Maker