Fire Pit Philosopher T-Shirts

Anti-Capitalist protesters: 'Just think - after the fall of Capitalism there'll be many more nights like this!'

"First I drink, then I barbecue — that's my secret."

'Think how all that chatting is affecting global warming.'

"Yes, one is a dog."

Cat Reunion

"The library rejected your request to ban all books on cats and squirrels. But, to be fair, it was no dumber than all the other book ban requests we get."

Courage. Love.

Herding lava back to the fire pit.

'I'm afraid I'll fall and no one will hear me.'

"Dogs are men."

"Let's see now: All dogs have four legs. I have four legs. Therefore, I am a dog."

"It's just a jogger!" "It's just a car!" "There's nothing out there now!" "I was thinking of the squirrel I saw last week"

Deer against capital punishment about to be shot.

Critical Ethanol report

'I'm trying to toilet train them.'

"When I get to heaven do you think I'll get my testicles back?"

"At first I was concerned about the Earth opening up. But I was going to build a fire pit, so it actually saved me a lot of time."

Meekness of Mr Pecksniff and his Charming Daughter

"I'm telling you! They don't know anything! No one is in charge!"

'Heidegger-Hi!'

The Inner Dog.

"Don't worry, Jules. It'll come up on your side of the house in just 12 hours."

"Let me take you back to a dark time when all you could do with a phone was make phone calls."

Cat on a psychiatrist's couch: 'Truth is, I'm not really a cat person.'

Fuels paradise.

"I've tried Buddhism, Taoism, Transendental meditation, Confucionism, Theolog, Scientgology....but I've found a good hand rolled joint of homegrown works best!"

Clown Nightmares

"You need a hobby."

"At first I was homesick....now I'll probably be campsick for awhile!"

'Aw, come on guys - at the end of the day, it's only a game - right?'

"Why can't they call it a 'Deer' or a 'Squirrel' market?"

'This is the last time I get a truck with a think tank.'

"These dizzy spells, I have a theory."

"I'm sorry your girlfriend left you, Frank...but you must concentrate on the job!"

"I don't think there's enough vodka for another week in Canada."